Tuesday, April 14, 2009

CD!'s Mayoral Endorsement

Thanks to the departure of former mayor Kwame Kilpatrick and a city charter more confusing than a typical X-Men storyline, Detroit is having a special election May 5 for city mayor (so if you're a resident, go out and vote!).

Now, we here at Comics Devastation! have thought long and hard about just who would be most fitting for the position. We've reviewed the candidates' platforms and backgrounds, and have come to the conclusion that only one person is truly qualified to handle the particular responsibilities and stresses unique to the city of Detroit.

With that, CD! gives its full endorsement for Mayor of Detroit to: Dr. Doom.

Dr. Victor Von Doom possesses skills in several key areas, namely:

Political Background: Doom has successfully ruled the country of Latveria for decades now, and has a proven track both in maintaining law and order and making a country prosper (as the citizens will no doubt attest to).

Diplomacy: Along with usual pressures of maintaining an economy based on technologically advanced weapons of mass destruction and world domination, Doom has also fended off several attempted invasions and coups, and has not been afraid to literally terminate government officials underneath him when their performance has proven lacking. Given the antics of the city council, Doom seems the candidate best equipped to handle negotiations with the like of Monica Conyers.

Race Relations: While some may scoff at the idea of an eastern European native running a city with a majority African-American population, Doom has consistently shown his sensitivity to matters of race and economics.

And last, but certainly not least,
Education: Doom has a Ph.D. in Evil. 'Nuff said.

And unlike our previous mayor, Doom shows little preference for inter-office romances.

Additionally, should Doom win in May, the odds of there even being an election in November will be slim at best, saving the city countless time and money best suited to more productive goals - such as destroying the Fantastic Four once and for all.

In this election, there is only one sensible choice - Doom!

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